Sunday, June 3, 2007

Congratu......never mind

So, he's here. King James takes his court to the NBA Finals. And the trumpets are blowing "Hail to the Chief" as he celebrates all the way to San Antonio after beating the Detroit Pistons in six games. Oh, wait. One problem. He's going to SAN ANTONIO.
And now the trumpets silence faster than the cantors when Hitler walked into a Bar Mitzvah. Although everyone not in a 100 mile vicinity of the AT&T is cheering for the Cleveland Lebrons when they role in on Thursday, the Spurs couldn’t care less. It’s the opposite of every movie you have ever seen about sports before: One team is the underdog with the background stories, while the other is the juggernaut that has a bunch of assholes on their team. But too bad life ain’t the movies, because Ohio’s finest has no chance.
Look at Cleveland. The superstar, the next Jordan, the King. "He’s never clutch, he can’t make free throws, he isn’t a leader yet.” But guess what, all the guys that normally are described like that are sitting home (save Duncan) and LeBron is here. He saved the ratings of the NBA from a disaster like a couple years ago while beating a possibly better team that just didn’t care for too long. It’s the sunrise of a behemoth of LeBron. And you want more stories? If Boobie isn’t the best nickname left, I don’t know what is. And he has shined, becoming the Pippen to LeBron’s rest of Chicago Bulls rosters from their championship years. And no one thought the LeBrons had a chance to make the finals, some (including me) not giving them a chance in hell to beat the Pistons, or even the Nets. But Bron Bron turned up the heat when needed to bring the Cavs to Finals.
Now take a look at their opponents. Picked to be a top contender all year long, and been in the same spot 4 of the last 9 years, the Spurs just followed the predicted. Nothing admirable or particularly great to watch. Duncan, although a complete stud, is a bore. Ginobili is a flopper (see Derek Fisher getting T’d up in game four of the Western Conference Finals), and Bowen is a person who doesn’t deserve to exist. A knee to the groin and purposely sticking his foot out to hurt another player on his landing during one series? Gimme a break. He should have been suspended twice, as well as many other times throughout the year. And the Spurs lucked out on getting Diaw and Amare suspended for Game 5 of the Suns series, with Horry being clutch again.
So we have the bully who catches the breaks and doesn’t play fair versus the first time player with the spunk and the nation behind him. If you were hoping for the Hollywood finish, too bad. If the Spurs don’t win this series, James can be inducted into the Hall of Fame when he gets his ring and will officially be eligible to start his own franchise as the (Fill in City name) LeBrons. The Spurs have the talent, defense, offense, experience, and coaching advantage in this matchup, and it seems too heavily weighted in their favor for the Cavs to breathe, let alone win a game.
And poof! You can feel all of the LeBron hype going away slowly as Tim Legler changes his mind as if he were schizophrenic, saying that LeBron still is unable to lead a team. And bye bye to the MJ, Magic, Big O, and Kobe comparisons on ESPN every night.
So I give LeBron and his rascals one clap for making it to the finals, but when HE wins, HE can have the other 359 degrees of the round of applause.